Anniversary Post

I recently read this post about all the things that I deserve to find in a husband. I couldn't help but think, "If I had waited for all that, I would have never gotten married."

I wonder if that is why so many people wait so long to get married. They look for Mr. Perfect instead of being realistic. Who seriously is going to cook supper with their spouse every night for the rest of their lives? Who seriously is going to remember to bring you coffee every morning?

Tomorrow I will have been married for 10 years, and I would like to tell those who read this that his touch is not always fireworks. This isn't a bad thing. If I felt fireworks every time he held my hand, I don't think you'd allow us in public! Surely, we'd never leave the bedroom. Forget a job and the kids! They have to fend for themselves! I'm too busy being self-absorbed to leave the bedroom today! Thank goodness Papa John's delivers and midwives do house calls!

Sarcasm aside, this isn't to say that happy marriages aren't to be found. Oh no. Happy marriages can exist and do exist.

At 29 (I'm going to milk that for another 4 days), I've been married for more than 1/3 of my life. My dear husband has moved us 6 times. We've lived in 3 different states. He has given me 3 lovely children. He has been a wonderful husband and father.

We learned early on in our marriage how to communicate and how to argue. This has been a valuable tool in keeping our marriage healthy. Before getting married we told each other as many things that we could think of that might be obstacles in our marriage. We talked about personality traits, family addictions, potential health issues, politics, religion, opinions on working, eating, and hobbies. Because we lived in different states from each other while engaged, we had lots of opportunities to have conversations which, while it was awful to live so far apart, was helpful in discovering all sorts of good and bad things about each other. We also talked about divorce. We agreed that no matter what, divorce would not be an option and that was that. We were getting married forever, period. We had already talked about everything that we could possibly think of to talk about before we got married, so we actually rarely disagree on things, but when we do we choose to work things out because that is what we agreed to do.

I have been happily "stuck" with my dear husband for 10 years and I'm happy to say that I sure haven't felt stuck. He has taken care of me when I was dying, helped bathe me when I was too weak to do it for myself, gotten up in the middle of the night with crying kids more times than I have, given me a home and children. He has remodeled a bathroom and a kitchen for me only to move shortly after he was done. He has helped me tend to gardens, cooked numerous pancakes and let me sleep in. He has carried me to bed when I've fallen asleep trying to stay awake to spend time with him. He has made birthday cakes for me. He has spent the last 10 years loving me, caring for me, and providing for me. And he never did it because I deserved it, he did it because he's my husband and that is what husbands do.
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Happy anniversary, honey. I love you.